Worse day - the day I realized I lost a couple of my true friends

A year and half has passed and I feel all the emotions I felt on that tragic day. The worse day of my life would seem like nothing compared to the jolt I had that day. The day, I realized that I had lost two of my closest friends. No, I didn’t lose them to death but by being a horrible friend. Like a flower that slowly wilts away so did our friendship due to no tender care; there was no loyalty, honesty and a lack of trust.

I was one of those people who weren’t sure who I really was, didn’t know what I wanted in life, nor did I value what others were sacrificing and doing for me. Like most teens I attended school as far as possible to get away from home and to have some freedom. What I didn’t know was what would result once I opened up. I was able to be who I really am. I experienced something I thought was unattainable, ‘true friendship’.

I lost contact with these individuals over the years all do to one incident. I believed that cruelty had set in and that I had lost respect. What I didn’t realize was what they were really doing for me. These individuals were being were TRUE FRIENDS. It took me quite some time to finally distinguish what ingredients make up a friend. Friendship is not a one-way street but 2-lane highway.

A Definition of a friend, friendship is not simply a "relationship", knowing someone, conversing with that person, or dealing with that person in business, school, or in casual acquaintance. True friendship is not just a "relationship", but self-sacrificing love. A friend is also one who supports, sympathizes, and is a person in whom you can confide.

There are unique qualities that a person must have to be considered a friend. An acquaintance is not automatically considered a friend. Just because you know someone does not mean there is an instant friendship. This does not mean that an acquaintance cannot change into a valued friendship. There are qualities that a friend must have, but time is also a factor. A friendship can develop in as short as a day, or it could take as long as a few years for full development. In the end, if time is taken for full development, then a real friendship will develop. The main way that trust is built up is with time. When you and a friend have trust, there will usually be a strong friendship. When there is no time spent together, then there will be a lack of trust in the friendship, and it could weaken.

To have a friend you must be a friend. This is something that I had lost. Friends should support each other at all times. In anything friends do, they should respect each other's opinions and support each other. Not only must friends be supportive of one another, there should also be a sympathetic tone when needed. Friends should not only listen, but also understanding needs to take place, as well as help. When a friend is in need, you are waiting for him as he would be waiting for you. If a friend is not sympathetic and aware of your needs, then there is a weak friendship. Each should know his friend's goals, needs, and wants. If these things are not known, then there is a weak relationship. Friends should set goals together to help develop a strong relationship. They can even help each other along the way. One person's weakness could be another friend's strength. A person needs to be loved, and that is what a friend does.

A friend needs to be respected as well as loved. Not only should a friend's needs be fulfilled, but also certain wants. A friend wants a person who will listen, love, and show respect, just as anybody would. A friend is also loyal and trustworthy. When friends talk to one another, it is known that the conversation should just be between them, especially if it is personal to either of them. Neither person should share any of the information with someone else. That is just like invading someone's privacy when you repeat something that a friend tells you without permission. You should be able to confide in and trust your friend.

What is friendship? It is a reciprocal love of one person for another, which is disinterested. It is a love that does not look for anything in return for the love given, and finds happiness in promoting the interests and happiness of the other. Such a love warms the heart, thrills the mind, and urges the friend to give everything for the other, just as Christ does for us--and leads to happiness in this world while pointing to God, who, Himself, is Love.

The formation and maintenance of a satisfactory friendship is an interpersonal achievement built upon a foundation of interpersonal skills. Some of these skills are also skills that contribute to social success in the broader sense of peer acceptance; others are specific to the requirements of friendship. A friend should be trustworthy, loyal, courteous, kind, helpful, and friendly. These important qualities should be looked for in a friend. Though all the qualities are hard to find in one person, it is still possible to get a majority of them.

Its true what they say about not knowing what you have until its gone. Over the course of the last few years these individuals have never slipped my mind. If anything they have made me stronger, more appreciative and more sincere.

God Bless them and all my friends.